There are undoubtedly things in your life you desire to experience differently. You long for better experiences of trust, wealth, health, intimacy, safety, love, value, appreciation, and the list goes on.

Conversely, you desire to encounter fewer experiences of threats, danger, inequity, and loneliness.

We Desire What We Don’t Have

When it comes to desires, you don’t yearn for something you already experience in the way you want. Perhaps you may desire more of it, but you don’t have a “desire” for something you’re already experiencing. For instance, when you feel like a successful parent, you don’t “desire” to feel that way because you already do.

Ask Direct Questions of Yourself

The first questions when faced with a desire are: “According to me, what should success look like in this situation? How should it be happening? What actions should I be taking, and how should people be treating me?”

For example, let’s imagine I’m fighting with my wife. The discomfort stems from my desire for greater acceptance and trust within my marriage. Success in this desire would entail experiencing less judgment from my partner, resulting in increased intimacy between us. When I am treated as trustworthy, I will have the intimate experience I truly desire.

Now You Can Assume Responsibility for Your Fulfillment

That is the essence of success. Those answers can now direct your efforts to be that person. To authentically live as someone worthy of those experiences, to the best of your ability. While also accounting for other appropriate measures, such as healthier boundaries.

The more specific you can be about what success should look like in an undesirable situation, the better. By identifying measurable indicators, you establish clear benchmarks for the experience you genuinely want.

Manifest It To the Best of Your Ability

These indicators serve as both the causes of the desired experience and the evidence that you are indeed experiencing it. While it may seem like a weighty responsibility, your chosen indicators are capable of bearing it because you have thoughtfully selected them. You have sought input from trusted friends and family, and you have drawn inspiration from stories of individuals who have experienced similar situations in the way you aspire to.

Remember, you have the power to transform your desires into tangible experiences that align with your true aspirations. By understanding what success means to you in each situation and consciously selecting the appropriate indicators, you can manifest the outcomes you desire.

Embrace the journey of unlocking success, and let your experiences reflect the fulfillment of your deepest desires.